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Embracing Uncertainties for the Life that You Want


This was a post I’ve written before I started traveling long-term.

Have you ever gone bunjee-jumping and experienced that moment when you were about to take that leap but something’s holding you back, could be fear or something greater, so you stay in that high spot a little longer, contemplating whether or not you go through with it then all of sudden, you just went for it?


These moments are what makes life all the more interesting. Because you are choosing to live and not merely to exist.

December 2014

It has been a month since I seriously considered the possibility of becoming a long-term traveler and it’s now becoming an obsession, which I hope means that I’m on the right track. Before this became an obsession, it seemed far-fetched, even impossible, until that moment where Rjay shared with me this article about a Filipina traveler whom he claimed I have similarities with.

Subconsciously, I’ve been wanting to drop everything and travel the world. My dream is to be a traveler than a successful career woman and to leave this world somewhere far away and people would just remember me from all the postcards I sent them.

It has been a month and questions are piling up. Some can be answered through research and some are still left unanswered; unanswered questions such as these:

How do you overcome fear of uncertainties?

Where and how do I begin given limited resources?

Will I survive?

What if I don’t make it? What if I fail?

What if I don’t want to stop and just continue traveling for the rest of my life?

In an attempt to calm myself down, I opened up to a few friends and these were their reactions:

Me: So I’ve been having crazy ideas lately. Mainly to quit my job, fly thousands of miles away, leave everything behind and travel to South America for a year. I don’t have much money saved up but I’ve been reading a lot and doing some research about how to survive and actually be a long-term traveler.

Why do I want to do this? I just have to. I no longer see myself as a successful career woman; I don’t find any fulfillment in that anymore. I reached a dead-end and I’m craving for something more and traveling will help me find that. I know it’s not always going to be easy or fun but I’m up for anything. I don’t need easy, I just need possible.

So tell me how crazy this sounds, how dangerous it is, if I’m already way over my head for even considering this and all that reality checks. I’m not looking for anyone to discourage me, I just want someone to give me that dose of reality to pull me back on my feet.

From Jeff:

What the hell are you thinking, Ces?!?! That’s me just feeling a little envious that your time has finally come.

Go! Admit it, you somehow knew that if there is one person who’s least likely to talk you out of it, it’s me! Hahaha.

3 weeks in Brazil and Peru have changed me in more ways than one, so I can only imagine what a year in South America could do to you. It’s gonna be hard and it’s not gonna be fun all the time, but it’s gonna be worth it.

You’ve done quite well on your research. I have a gazillion of tips to share, especially because I’m VERY passionate about South America (I’m MENTALLY traveling in South America every single day), but I’d probably hold my piece til you’re about to go. For now, it seems you already know what you need to know. You’ll be fine. It’s normal to feel a little jittery. Who wouldn’t be? You’re going for an adventure in unfamiliar places! Be worried if you don’t feel scared because it means you’re holding yourself back, you’re not pushing yourself enough to the limits, not getting out of your comfort zone.

I’m sure you have already thought this over, Ces. Make it happen. Let me know when you plan to be in Sao Paulo, so I can arrange my travel plans next year accordingly. I would love to meet you for a cuppa in Rua Augusta or Vila Madalena!

From Trisha on FEAR of uncertainties:

You don’t. You won’t think of what will happen tomorrow. Nobody knows. We are never ready for anything. There is no crash course to prepare us on how to live life. We just have to do it. It’s not that complicated — but we always find ways on how to make it complicated.

During dinner with Rob:

Just look at it this way, you’ll look back at this exact moment and you’ll say to yourself “Rob and I were just talking about this and look where I am now…” I made it happen because you made me believe it’s possible.

“Leave everything behind. Home is where you want to go.” – Dina

From Lorem:

So let me tell you this…it’s super possible like everything in life. There are risks, but only those who try can talk about it; of course you’ll have moments where not everything is happiness…but in the end you are doing what you need to do.

You’re gaining FREEDOM from the consuming world.

And maybe, while you go for a spiritual adventure, you’ll find yourself and understand yourself a little bit more. You need to do what your heart is saying and not what the world and people expect.

I’m 100% behind you in your dream. GO!

You must travel knowing where you’re going and don’t trust many people. Do your research. Check where you can make money or have a cheap meal. Just in case, check where the Philippine embassy is located and have a return ticket open so you can change and come back home when you feel like it.

In the end, know that life is too short…dream and dream big, listen to your heart beat, don’t be afraid of experiencing life but be scared of not living.

Lorem is an inspiration in my life. He’s the reason why I want to do better in Capoeira and in life and to hear him say that he’s 100% behind me in pursuing this dream is so surreal and overwhelming. It’s amazing how he can make me want & do things for myself and that makes me more excited about so many things in life. I am blessed to have someone like him, even if he’s a bully, and I’m thankful for that one bully who made a difference in my life.

Questions will never cease to exist and in reality, the answers will only come during and after the experience. Everything I’ve read in blogs, online research and advices I got from friends are mere guide. And whatever experience I will gain out of this will depend on my choices, interests and preferences along the way as I am the author of my life story.

The universe is conspiring and the thought of it excites me. Someday soon, I’m going to take that leap of faith. Let this be mine.

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” – George Bernard Shaw